Dear Brides, Last month we went to an Asian Wedding Show and spoke to lots of couples about how their wedding planning was going. Amongst other things we wanted to find out who had taken the lead in the wedding planning and also how the wedding planning was shared amongst the Bride and the Groom.
Not surprisingly, for most couples the Brides had taken the lead! Us girls have been thinking about our wedding day for years and so we know exactly how we want to it be! That said we were fortunate to meet some couples where the Groom was leading the way or taking on 50% of the responsibility and this was really nice to see!
For the Grooms that were not very involved in the wedding planning, we found that most of them were actually quite keen to help but simply didn’t know how or where to get involved. They found the whole planning process overwhelming and so just defaulted to not helping at all! With a little a bit of hand holding and guidance they were willing to help out and this was the inspiration behind this blog 🙂
Without going to the extent of BBC’s ‘Don’t Tell the Bride’ and getting the Groom to plan the whole wedding, we wanted to give the Groom some tips on how to support you during this time of planning, planning and more planning! So if you would like your fiancé to be more involved in your wedding planning journey, Share this Blog with him 🙂
You may have just spent quite a bit of time planning and executing the perfect proposal, your girlfriend (now fiancé) is over the moon and the happiest you have ever seen her and so now you think its time to have a break….but in reality once the proposal is over it is all go, go, go with the wedding planning. To start with you probably have this feeling of “Where do I start?” and so you just leave it to your fiancé to get on with things. But to be honest that feeling of not knowing what to do next is most probably what your fiancé is going through too! I’m not going sit here and tell you that wedding planning is easy because it really isn’t but there are a few things that you can do to make your fiancé’s life easier. So for those Grooms who want to help out and be hands on with the wedding planning, here are our Top 5 tips on how you can support your wife-to-be during this time!
Tip 1: Communication
All men need to know that the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law relationship can be a sensitive one! So whilst your fiancé is busy planning, coordinating and booking things for wedding make sure your parents are completely up to date with what is going on! Your fiancé will be with her family most of the time and so they will naturally get the updates and feel more involved, however, in a lot of cases the mother-in-law can sometimes feel left out because she is not receiving the same level of communication at no fault of the bride. So before any feelings get hurt, take the lead to communicate well with your parents and siblings on how the planning is progressing and workout with your fiancé the different ways you can get your parents more involved too 🙂
Tip 2: Your Guest List
When the wedding planning kicks off, set some time aside with your parents to start building out a guest list using the Plan & Wed Guest List Tool. It will take some time before nailing this down so it always better to get the ball rolling from the beginning. Also this will help you and your fiancé understand better the size of venue required for the wedding, which is mostly likely going to be the first thing you book!
If you are trying to reduce your numbers – I found this diagram that may help 🙂
Tip 3: Take on the following things research and bookLike I mentioned above, your fiancé is probably feeling as overwhelmed as you are and so have a chat with her and make a list of some of the items that perhaps you can look into. Having this open conversation with your fiancé will take some weight off her shoulders as there will be less for her to worry about and also provide her more time to focus on other aspects of the wedding. Here are a few suggestions of the things that you could potentially help with:
- Hire your transports (car, horse etc) that will take you to the wedding venue
- Hire your transport for you and your bride after the wedding
- Take lead on catering. Shortlist caterers, booking tastings for your family and your fiancé’s family to attend
- Hire Dhol Players
- Shortlist and book Photographers & Videographers
- Hire DJ & Entertainment if you are having a reception
- Once your fiancé has determined which dress she will be wearing, ask her for pictures and begin to look for sherwani’s
- Decide who your Groomsmen will be and what their role will be during the wedding
As you research prices and shortlist suppliers be sure keep your fiancé up to date 🙂 You’re both in this together!
The Plan & Wed Supplier Directory can provide you a great starting point to find your wedding suppliers
Tip 4: Budgeting
Helping your fiancé stay on budget will be the biggest thing you could possibly help her with! When you go through the process of wedding planning, you both will face many ideas and inspiration out there that can make yours dream wedding. During this time it will be very easy to overspend and so by using the Plan & Wed Budget Tracker you can set out a budget that both of you can work to. Throughout your wedding planning days continue to update the tracker with all your expenses to make sure you stay within budget!
Tip 5: Book the honeymoonWhilst your fiancé will be looking into her dream venue and wedding dress, perhaps your can take some time into looking at possible honeymoon destinations. Have a few light hearted conversations with your fiancé to see if there are any areas that she would like to go. Then you can set a budget and contact some Travel Companies or research online. Here are some links to get you started:
We hope the tips above help you and we wish you all the best with your wedding planning 🙂